It’s tempting to think of compassion as a simple and benign feeling. If we can respond to suffering with a modicum of tenderness and curiosity, we’re likely to feel the stirrings of compassion. But, if we’re willing to get close to suffering, risk being impacted by it, and respond with needed care, there’s courage involved. Afterall, no one wants to suffer, and most of us hope to be rid of suffering as soon as possible.
It’s for this reason that the historical Buddha Shakyamuni encouraged us to work through our fear of suffering. Slowly, patiently, he offered a way of swapping out fear with skillful engagement, a wish to understand its causes and antidotes.
Whether you’re tending to your own suffering or someone’s else’s, it might help to appreciate the challenges of compassion in the spirit of building up to it. Often there’s a gap between how we hope to respond to unforeseen difficulties and struggles, and how we duck and cover.
This is part of the process – noticing whether we’ve built the reserves of courage needed to stay the course. However you find yourself responding to the next moment of suffering, offer yourself the compassion needed to stay the course. Working through our difficulties is arduous, often stirring fear, anxiety, and feelings of resignation. But with enough curiosity and determination, you may find that just when you’re expecting to retreat, some part of you will come forward endowed with the courage to care about suffering with respect.
Doing so brings integrity to suffering, helping us cull meaning, even from those moments we can’t imagine surviving. This is the good news offered in Buddhist psychology – suffering helps us know we are endowed with extraordinary capacities for courage, care, and steadiness.
Let yourself discover these gifts by turning toward suffering with the courage of a Buddha.
Why Is Compassion for Yourself and Others an Act of Courage?
